


All I Crave

by windowsmaker



Category: Far Cry 5
Genre: Crack, Humor, Other
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-04-13
Updated: 2018-04-13
Packaged: 2019-04-22 10:12:51
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 218
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14306484
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/windowsmaker/pseuds/windowsmaker
Summary: What goes on behind the scenes at Eden's Gate rallies.





	All I Crave

Joseph Seed stands at his podium in the church, looking at the Eden’s Gate members as he addresses the problem of the deputy. He adjusts his glasses, then opens his mouth. One word falls from his mouth. 

“Weak.” His loud voice booms through the church as he glares through his orange tinted sunglasses. His eyes focus to the poster of the wanted sinner, known as the Deputy. Murmurs of agreement sound through the church until Joseph stops them all with a hand in the air. 

“Strong.” His gaze adverts to the crowd, looking each member in the eye individually. A few happy hollars sound through the air unti Joseph begins to speak once more. 

“You all know how I was brought up,” He paces the small raised platform, making hand gestures as he speaks, enunciating at the correct spots. “Born on a mountain, raised in a cave.” He picks a knife from the small stand nearby, and throws it with expertise at the wall on the far end of the church. 

He whispers something unintelligible, then adjusts himself and looks past the crowd. His voice raises over the silence as seven words “Truckin’ and fuckin’ is all I crave.” He closes his mouth and bows, his head high. As Joseph walks off the stage, the crowd goes wild.


End file.
